Dealing with Conflict

May 6, 2015 @ 11:18 am by ACT

Working on a team is something that all of us have done since we were children. We all understand the vital importance of teams and relationships. With synergy and collaboration being hot buttons in today’s workplace, working together in a harmonious and effective environment is more important than ever. We try to avoid confrontation and conflict at all costs. However, a team without conflict is a team without passion.  If you are truly aiming to be a top performing team, conflict will come up. It is a necessary part of a team full of life and passion. At the same time, conflict on a team is extremely difficult.  So, when the going gets tough and we find ourselves and our team lost in translation, what do we do?

One principle of dealing with conflict that many of our clients are familiar with is the 100 + 1 principle. The idea is to find something the other person is saying that you genuinely agree with 100%. If you can’t find something, look harder and continue to ask open ended questions. Something will come up that you agree with. Once you find that something, paraphrase it back to your team member. Most people get this far, however the next part is the most important. You say, “at the same, and, also, etc.” Any word except BUT will work here. Finally, state your opinion in a genuine and respectful way. Rinse and repeat. For example: “I absolutely agree with you that we do not need to babysit our new employees. At the same time, early training is vital to developing effective team members for the long-term.”

Next time you find yourself getting frustrated and seemingly unable to get your point across try this method. It takes practice, but soon you’ll find yourself communicating during conflict in a more effective and respectful way.